Friday, April 4, 2014

Is a Man-Cave Really All that Manly? (for fun)

I love my garage.  In fact that was a major deciding factor in buying my house.  It is a genuine two-car garage, which means that you can comfortably park two cars in it and there is still room for bikes, mowers, snow blowers, tool benches, refrigerator, weight bench, TV…etc. and you can still walk around the cars. It’s a great garage. It’s a great place to be doing manly things.

I exercise out there in the mornings.  My Saturday’s are spent out there.  I am out there frequently during the week.  It’s a manly place to be…as garages have been for years.  What is more manly than a great garage?
Iron Man's garage is the greatest garage ever. (the Batcave is a close second since it is more of a cave than a garage...)

This is part of the reason why I hold a certain level of disdain for the modern invention of the so called “Man-cave”. In fact, I question just how manly these places are.

Is the modern “Man-Cave” really all that manly?

My response is a definite “NO” based on the following assessments.

Interior Designers… The words “Interior Designer” and “Man-cave” should not be used in tandem. There is even a TV show featuring guys who design and build ‘man-caves’. 

I suspect that the target audience for this show is women who wish their husband was the guy on the left and could actually build his own 'man-cave'.

So my question is…how manly is it to have someone else design, color coordinate, and construct your man cave?  (some people may argue that they are too busy to do the work on their own home…and if that is the case then I’d say YOU ARE TOO BUSY (period).  Pick up a dang hammer and be a man for crying out makes you feel like THOR!)

You can buy accessories for it at a craft store  Seriously, there are whole lines of crafty things available at boutiques and craft stores to decorate your man-cave…

Block of wood with letters all over it...usually found next to the tampons.
The only thing that is acceptable to buy at a craft store to do any kind of manly decorating is some type of model kit. (preferably of some kind of military vehicle).

(along with the above point) If you post ‘rules’ on the door of your ‘man-cave’…what are you? Four-years-old?

Vinyl lettering on the wall… really? 

Walls that are made to actually look like a cave?

Do you also have costumes? Where do you put the TV?

Entire rooms dedicated to a single sports team

What do you do when your team looses all the time?

Oddly enough…most man-caves of this sort are dedicated to American football teams, which begs the question “What does this say about your average football fan?”

You have to use coasters

Here are some other factors that lead me to conclude that the modern ‘Man-cave’ represents the opposite of what real manliness should be.

1)    Most man-caves cost more than a car to put together.
2)    If you put photos of it on Pinterest.
3)    They are so packed with memorabilia that it is more of a museum than a man-cave.
4)    The purpose of most ‘man-caves’ is to sit on a big soft chair and do nothing more than watch TV while also avoiding family responsibilities.
5)    Since the appearance of the interior of the home will typically result in the woman of the house being judged by it…almost every man-cave must meet her expectations of décor, cleanliness and present-ability.  If SHE doesn’t like it…it isn’t going to happen.  If she doesn’t bless it, then there will be no man-cave.  So doesn’t that really make it HER room?
6)    Vikings, Aztecs, Gladiators, Samurai, EVEN Cave men didn’t have designated “Man-Caves”…

In all seriousness though...

When we were first married my wife and I agreed that she is in charge of decorating our home.  I help to paint, repair, remodel and I do input ideas of how things will look but ultimately the home is where she lives, works, plays and is MOM.  I fully support her in what she wants to do to make our house a HOME.  We do the work of it together.  Because of my work and efforts to provide, I don’t really need a separate place to ‘escape’ my family.  I want excuses to be with them. So we create spaces where we can be together…not apart.

So, I’m making a call for the real men to return to the garage.  Go fix your car, get oil on your hands! Repair a bicycle! Play with your kids in the back yard!  Get Dirty! Work hard! Get away from the TV and LIVE life (don’t just watch it) Remodel places in your home.  Work with your wife to make your house your PALACE.

Make the world your ‘man-cave’.

It's also my 'man-cave'